A Genius but a weakling...

Terrified. He was. He looked around. Only smoke. No voices. No movement. No life. Am I in hell, he thought. His pulse raced. Searing hot pain kept him down. Resting on his shoulder, he tried to get up. Stabbing pain shot through his body. Agony. To the maximum. The air was filled with the smell of blood and bile. A hot liquid formed a pool drenching his clothes. A pool of blood. His own.

Voices. No, not voices, shouts, screams, cries. Of people. Injured. Of people. In agony. Of people.Who saw blood for the first time. Of people. Who saw hundreds of limbs scattered around. Of children. Crying. Trying to find their mothers and fathers and brothers and sisters. Of news reporters. Trying to find their breakthrough report. Of cars. Of ambulances. Of fire brigades. Of people. Panicked.

But he heard none. His hearing was damaged beyond repair. The pain was unbearable. He dragged his useless body with his hands. Crawling. Stumbling across rubble. Every time he called out, blood gushed out of his throat. The smoke started to clear. But he still couldn’t see. He didn’t know what happened. His head demanded answers. But who was going to answer them? He looked down to his feet or rather the place where his feet used to be. The flesh had turned black and was oozing a black coloured liquid. Not that it mattered. He had to find his daughter. His seven year old darling. His ‘jhoomar’ as he fondly called her.


He called out again. Sputtering blood. Everywhere. Along with his feet, a part of his lower torso was also gone. Good I had an empty stomach, he mused to himself. “jhoomar!!” No response.


Strong hands gripped him. A stretcher was brought out. He was carried away and his incoherent cries of jhoomar were dismissed as cries of agony. There was nothing left in him. The body drained of blood. Half his flesh burnt. And limbs were a mess of things. There was nothing left in him….except one. The desire to see his daughter alive. To see her safe and in good hands. “jhoomar!”


He looked around to see countless bodies around him in similar or worse conditions.
He calmed himself down. His hands grew cold and blue and he took more than ten minutes to get his wallet out. He took a picture of jhoomar and looked at it for a long time. It was taken in goa when they had gone for their first outing. The sky grew dark, clouds gathered and rain fell, washing the blood of some faces and the sins of others.
It was as if mother nature was crying. The water mixed with blood to form small rivulets.
The blood from people belonging to various castes and religions, from old- young ,men –women, from people who were just having a casual day at karol baug, a few moments ago.

Moments later, a young scout came to the very place with a young girl. The girl was asked to identify her father among the endless bodies lying around. She didn’t take much time. Her picture was lying on a man’s chest. His lower abdomen was severed and he had no feet. But his face bore an expression of peace and calamity. As the rain fell, so did her tears. Not that the body would recognize the tears from the rain, but his soul must have, she hoped.

100 miles away, in a two room apartment, a frightened, pale young man switched on the news.

“….wild spread chaos….hundreds killed…thousands injured….no one claims responsibility….the terrorists’ reign continues…this is anjali sharma reporting from…”
He switched it off. Opened the closet. Saw his prized collection. Loaded it. And held it to his head. There was no hesitation. A pool of blood. Again. His own.


Two blocks away, another man was watching the same news. He smiled. It couldn’t have been better, he thought.
The phone rang.
”he killed himself. I think he couldn’t take it. He committed….”
“forget it. Good that he did it himself. I didn’t want any more bloodbath among us.
He did a wonderful job. No one else could have engineered the blast so well. But he was a weakling. A genius but a weakling. ”

insight into ...........

warning::: long post ahead

I ve been edging myself to write about this topic but there was this unnecessary reluctance in ma mind whether to write it or not since i am, at least nowadays, giving an impression to the reader that i am self centered and pompous by writing about myself..but o well anyways..here goes....

i ve always believed that there are voices inside one s head...to tell you what to do...when...how...etc...to decide things...to distinguish between right and wrong...and more...they re always there...whether ur sleeping or standing or walking or shitting...they never cease...they go on continuously with their blabber ....some of it useful...most of it useless...and surprisingly even when your whole body is down and out...ur back is pleading you to lie down..ur limbs are giving up on you...you just want to forget about everything and rest...even in those times...these voices are there...dominating your course of action...guiding you....directing you...consoling you....reprimanding you....criticizing you...supporting you...ppl like to call them thoughts...or ideas...or opinions ...i call them voices coz at least in my head they er always shouting orders to me....

k...where was i...aah yes...voices...this is not a general view coz i dunno how others head works....am talking solely about my empty 4 into 4 inch container above my neck...there are a million voices in my head...but only a few of them dominate others....and remain...forever,,,,one is the self critic..always tellin me that i ve done something horrible...if not then he s kind enough to tel me what a worthless piece of shit i am...he s the most powerful thing on ma mind...dunno how and to tame him.....the other one is the positive thinker...i cal him the pusher....he s a die hard optimist...always helping supporting...pushing me ahead with all his enthusiasm....these two keep fighting all the time...and i have to sit back and listen to the one who wins....and there is one more....the enlightened one....one who believes that no matter how much i struggle i am going to get what i am destined for and that there is no use struggling as life lays down a path for us to follow.....i find this guy the most stable one but he lacks aggression so ends up on the losing side all the time...these 3 voices form more than 3 quarters of my mind....we discuss...we look...we analyse...and we implement....when there is balance between these 3...i am stable....otherwise...i am a wreck....

now i ll try to give you the most honest insight....on the day my exams got over....scenario....have just reached home....its 9.30 in the night.....lets see whats going through my mind...
characters:::
critic voice::: cv
optimistic voice::: ov
enlightened voice::: ev
...and myself::: me

i just reach home....take my shoes off...just when i am taking the bag off, cv starts with his one liners....

cv:: "before you even try to think about resting your worthless ass on the bed, please try to remember that you have a big decision pending....you have been toying with this for quite some time now and a decision is urgently required as its difficult to do both....cmon...cat or gre...temme quick...."

i grumble ...trying not to pay attention to what cv has just said...but he s already done the damage....and he knows it...
me::: "am trying to get some rest here....i just came home...can i not relax and talk later?"

cv::::"o yes i am so sorry for disturbing your highness as i conveniently forgot what a brilliant paper u wrote today...i agree u totally deserve the rest...."

that stings....goes straight through my heart...shit....i start losing composure once again...just then,,,

ov::: "dont listen to him yug....he s just meant to bring u down...big deal if one ppr didnt go ur way....there will be a million chances later....and u have to learn from this so that u dont repeat the blunders committed before ....u ll never learn if u dont commit mistakes...."

cv:::: "now i see wer he gets his losing nature from....if u constantly live under the blanket of these false assurances yug,, u ll never progress in ur life...be practical...just say that u have become a waste..."

ov:::: "thats not true...try to rem the times wen u wer down and u told ur self that u ll work hard and u did....so pull urself up...your the best...you can u will u must!!!"

cv:::: "ppl here are so good at talking bullshit...."

i really dont know what to do...so i just lie down and close my eyes....unfortunately that doesnt help my situation....these voices get louder,....

cv::: "ok loser...we r moving away from the topic...decide...mba or ms?"

Me:: "i odnt really know..."

cv::: "wow....u do me proud bro....at least i got a pat reply for this question....now i know wat ur confident about...ur confident about the fact that u dont know anything and cant make one straight decision,,,,"


ov::::"lets see...and cv u shut up...yug u can do an mba....cat is difficult i know dat...but u hav the skills and aptitude to crack it..."

cv::: "whoooooooooaaaaaaaa!!! there!!!! may i beg to interrupt.....a little status check here....a handful of the aspirants aactly make it to the mba courses....and may i remind u tht cat is one of the toughest exams in the world....and may i refer to wat happened at ur previous try at a really competitive exam? The iit? U sukd dude...u sukd really bad...so think again..."


ov::: "iit was a different issue...there was loads of pressure....mba is much abt aptitude than knowing many things....so there is a difference,...and it can be exploited..."

i dunno y i did this but i mustered some courae to try and open another window of opportunity by mentioning gre....i thot that would silence cv....i needed to outwit him....in vain again....

cv:::: "gre??? oho...the person who stil struggles with errors to write lab programs wants to do masters in computers.....i dont why but that didnt tickle....are you trying to joke....cos tht wasnt funny......accept it ur technically challlenged...."

i was getting irritated....this was one of the times wen cv dominated and ov was at the loss of words...i hated that....this was one of the time i feel low and depressed....but i wasnt gonna let tht happen to me on tht day...at least not on the day the exams end,...so i begged ev to get me out of the situation...ev was listening to the conversation for a long time.....

ev:::: "i think you both need to give yug a little time...its fair of him to think tht his exams are over and he does need rest...therz no use workin ur mind wen it is tired....decisions...these are some things tht we hav to take...but it may be remembered that indecision is also a decision...so it would be foolish to say that i have made this decision...things happen for ppl....same way decisions also ohappen and they are not taken....there wil be an omen tellin u wat ur decidin is incorrect...o sorry...nothin is incorrect...the omen wil tel u whether wat ur decidin is FOR YOU OR NOT....so its pointless thinkin abt it ay and night esply on the day the exams end...it is a time to relax...recouperate....and refreshen ourselves so tht we r natural enough to avoid disruptances in the path of our thinking and our omens....so for now we are not taking this conversation farther and not thinking about it for the time being..."


i smile and open my eyes to see food kept on the table....am still with my socks on and the same clothes on....the clock reads 1 a.m....i get up wash ma face....devour all the food....put the lights off ...and lie down again...closing my eyes...wen slowly as expected....cv starts off again.....

oh shi(f)t ! ! !

hi. exams on. Less time. So no updates.....this was one article i had written on may 10th n i dont have the patience to edit it...

its may 10th. I have roughly 10 days to go for my sem 4 exams (read: death) to commence and here i am. Tired. Bored. Frustrated. (blame it on i.e.m.!!!). even more so because my vivas ended day before yesterday. I need a break but given the situation i am in, its better to start early.

There are some things which i get annoyed at really quickly. One of them is my parents not telling me some things which they should. They think that it will get me thinking into these things and affect me.
Bullshit.

Lately, i had been hearing the 'shift' word a lot in the maa-baap conversations (i tend to accidently eavesdrop sometimes when i am in the kitchen making myself a snack) . The discussion had taken several forms like argument, debate, vociferous declaration and what not. Especially my mom(i guess all moms are like this). I confronted my dad and he told me to mentally prepare myself as we are moving out of the house to a new one by the end of june. Even though i was expecting this, my hands and feet went cold. Now cmon, i ve been living in this house for about 17 years. You dont expect me to be happy to leave it!!

its so bad. Shifting sucks. Dad said that there was a chance that wouldnt happen and i pray so. But its a very thin chance. Might as well forget about it. I ll miss my friends. Goes without saying. But some subtle things have been such a part and parcel of my life that i cant imagine my life without them....

... the daily morning 4 o clock noise of the milk truck.

...the sweet scent of chocolate wrappers in my building lift.

...the awesome sea view from my terrace.

...my early morning jog at the race course.

...smell of horse shit along my way around the race course towards mahalaxmi station everyday.

...the futile wait for bus 124.

...the sweet scent of agarbatti in the passage corridor.(courtesy::neighbour)

...the ganesh visarjan proceedings in my colony every year.

...the broken glass windows of the opposite buildings reminding me of my school days when we used to play cricket and broke those so conveniently(and how the govt has been incapable of repairing them even now!!).

...the empty 8.17 borivali slow everyday.

...sams-the best hajjam in tardeo.

...haji ali juice centre.

...walks along worli sea face.

...troubling couples making out near lala lajpatrai college.

...tnmc ground beside my building..

...the 20 yr old rajdoot(its a bike..dunno whose but it looks awesome!! lol!!)

...difficulty in crossing the 6 lane road at haji ali stretch.

...the 9 to 10 timepass below with friends.

...my room (sob sob!!)

...tardeo book center ( my saviour throughout!!!)

...sardar pav bhaji

...kalpana restaurant

...city bakery

...flora

...sealord

..paschim
(the last 6 are restaurants!!!)

...the every sunday football in lala lajpatrai colg compound

...an isolated place near breach candy

...the irritating tune on opening the lift door

...phoenix mills

...the easy access to town

...THE TAXI!!!!

...the usual 6.5 sec delay of my room tubelight

...my rooms dirty curtains

...throwing water on bhelpuriwala below

...still but unusuallly moving cars, at the back of lala colg quadrangle!!!!(lol)

...worli police swimming pool


,....the list is endless but i wont bore the reader (if any) furthur!!!!!!!

bottomline:: i dont want to shift!!!!!!

Manu.

warning:: long post ahead.....



I was in the 10 th standard at that time. It was in the evening, after schoolthat I was walking towards the bus stop. there was traffic at one spot and to avoid it I decided to walk some distance and catch a bus from the left junction. I took a left and walked humming on a new song..and I saw her.

She was a short, bright child who seemed to be 9or 10 years old though she claimed to be 13. she was sitting below a street lamp with a basket of vegetables in front of her and two books on her lap. That bright angel-like face , her deep dark eyes and her cute little smile………..i can remember till today. She was dressed almost in rags, but she sat with some dignity.

I approached her little ‘shop’. My shadow appeared on her books and she looked up at me. What a sweet little child she was!!!! She smiled and asked me which vegetables she wanted. I didn’t answer.

“ what are you reading?”

“English balbharti”
the cover showed std.5.

“which school do you go to?”

“I don’t go to school. One of the school children was kind enough to give it to me.”

“how do u know to read if u don’t go to school?”

“I went to school for 3 years but dropped out as I couldn’t afford the minimal; fees.”

“is that why you are selling vegetables? To gather enough money to go to school again?”

“no.i am doing this because my father cant sell vegetables today.”

I enquired why.

“because he s drunk again and hitting my mother at home.”

There was no remorse or sadness in her voice. All throughout the conversation her pitch was jovial and happy.

“what is your name?”

“manu.”

I took out my wallet. 45 bucks. 5 to go home. I took 40 bucks and handed it over to her.

She stared at the money and innocently enquired how many vegetables I needed.
“those are for your books. Buy more. Read more.”

Her smile faded. She stood up held her hand in front. she didn’t want the money.
“thank you, but I am not a beggar. I sell to earn money.”

Surprised. I didn’t expect such a reaction.
“I am not treating you as a beggar. Keep it for now.. return it later when you think u can.. for now get more books.”

She clutched at the notes. The reluctance was obvious.
“please give me ur address and tel. No.”
shit. She was adamant.

“you wouldn’t need that. I ll meet you soon.”
Saying that I walked away, not looking back, praying that she wont come up and hand me the money. I I gave her money to console myself . to make me feel that I tried to do at least something for that poor girl. I got into my bus and headed home.


3 years later, I walked down the same lane towards my school to take my passing certificate. The clerk wasn’t there. Disappointed, I was returning to my bus stop when I saw a girl about average height, long hair, looking up to me, smiling. She had grown but I could never forget her innocent, sparkling eyes. Manu.


“you have grown, manu.”

“so have you…come with me.”

A dark middle aged man with grey hair was sitting in his vendor stall. The place was respectable, not shabby.
Manu led me to him, her father, and told him something in a language I couldn’t understand.

The deep lines on his face vanished and he smiled. He got up to his feet and shook my hand. He cleared his throat and said
““
I was of your age when I left my house. My father was a farmer with three sons and I was the youngest. We were a rich content family till the time we brothers started fighting for our share of land. All of us were married. I decided to come to mumbai.

We built a shop and I sold vegetables and fruits. We were quite happy. Then it all happened. In 1993, after the bomb blasts, riots took place and my shop and house were burned down. Everything I had saved for my family went up in flames. After things turned to normal, I had no shop, no savings, no home and a family to look after. I was angry and took up drinking. I used to remove my frustration on my wife sometimes. But we were never starved. I came to know the reason much later .my little girl used to sell vegetables and bring money for my family. When you gave her the money that day, she didn’t buy books. She bought medicines for her mother. I was ashamed of myself.””

He took out a handkerchief and tapped it under his moist eyes.

““
I resolved never to drink again and go back to rebuild my shattered business. It took time but my daughter edged me on. She supported me. And now we are happy and back to how we were.””

He reached out to manu and kissed her on the forehead.

“I know why you told her all that about returning the money and I know ypu wont accept it now.”

He took out the most red apples from his collection, packed them and handed it to me.
“as a token of my thanks to you my child. For helping a poor family.”

I took the bag, shook the man s extended hand. My hand was clammy with sweat .i couldn’t muster enough courage to look at manu again .when I finally did, she was there looking at me smiling her own innocent smile. It reminded me of that evening when I saw her first. Was this the same 10 year old who saved her family? how could a child so young understand so much and carry out such a difficult task all by herself> a shattered family? A drunk father? The time when most children play games and dance around… this child did so much…….


She was 5 years younger to me but I felt she was a hundred times more mature, than me.

I said good bye to manu and walked towards my bus stop. My head was begging me to stop all the thoughts racing through my head. My mind kept me on.

I caught my bus and took the last seat. For the first time in 9 years, I felt my eyes moisten.

hava nahi aa raha hai!!!!

following is one of the most stupidest post i have ever written in my life....read at ur own risk....dont blame me later........i just wanted to try a present tense style of writing ...instead of a normal past tense approach....

time: 5:30 p.m....date...2 days before
commencement of vivas(yes...the 25 marks wala fadu vivas...in which the external
screws ur case)....am trying to study
sitting in college...gogo beside me....i
get bugged and call sinan...
" me: i need your hamachar(yes thats a
reference book dudes...we mu students do
refer ref books at times!!!!)....xerox
karna hai...where are you?
sinan(from now on will be referred as
chodu): ya get the xerox done...am at
bhavans ground with rahul(maddy) and
rohit(jungli)...doing lukkhagiri..hum log
hava khane aaye hain....get it done fast
have to go home...am leaving in 10
mins...."

i have been with chodu long enough to
understand what kind of crazy thoughts go
through his head...and i was pretty sure
this too was his idea..bhavans
ground...???...some stupid way to kil time
and entertain himself....

i hurry(hurrying means walking down aaram
se simultaneously searching for ppl whom i
no so thati can talk and waste more time
over them) to annu xerox and give the book
for photo-copying...on the way back to
college...(actualy bhavans ground)...i meet
ashwathi...i convince her to wait for me
and sinan as i tell her that we r all
leaving for home...i n ashwathi go to
bhavans ground...find junglii maddy n
chodu...sitting on the grass ...in the
middle of the ground....it is odd to see
them there.........3 ppl sitting down...and
no one else there....we walk up to
them....chodu starts off with his weird
face expressions...

" maddy: eh, hava nahi aa raha hai...
chodu: ayega re...patience rakh...
ashwathi:(laughing)
me: what are you ppl doing here?
chodu: hum log hai na(pauses...then makes
a really typical sinan face...the confused
as to what to say wala face)....tp kar rahe
hain...padh padh ke pak gaye....and its so
hot...so hava khane ke liye aaye hain..
....(laughter)........


maddy: eh, hava nahi aa raha hai...
junglii: rona band kar be...ayega..
maddy: nahi aa rha hai be...
ashwathi:(laughs).

the most important thing to notice is what
kind of stupid conversation is going on and
how inadverently we are participating in
it..

..junglii has nothing to do...so he picks a
stone...and aims at maddys shirt pocket...a
really stupid lukkha game commences...of
throwing stones at each other aiming at
each others pockets...everyone actively
participates in the most unique
contest...of throwing the maximumm no. of
stones in your opponents pocket...and am
saying it again and again to irritate the
reader...

...the main thing to be noted here is how
lukkha we are to play such a game , sitting
in the middle of our college ground with 2
days to go for our vivas...

"
me: hey lets go for a jog around the
ground...long time havent done that...
junglii agrees.
maddy: eh main bhaag nahi sakta be,...pagal
hai kya..
junglii: mote sale jog karne ka hai..
...
we start jogging...in a really stupid
way...run around like school children
....make enough noise and halla gulla and
other cheap stuff(courtesy:chodu) to
attract the attention oif the cricket team
thta has come to practice here and not to
mention the old nana nanis(who must be
discussing how the future of our country is
in danger looking at us..)...suddenly chodu
challenges junglii for a sprint....and both
end up panting at their own stupidity/....i
also end up sprinting with maddy only to
realise that i too (along with maddy) am in
no shape to run.........still i beat maddy
at it...(yes victory!)

we again come back to the same spot again
and sit down....and have nothing to talk
about and so we bore each other with trash
talk about how the vivas are going to
be...finally chodu saya that he s not going
home but studying with junglii and
maddy....coa...something which i dont want
to miss...i look at ashwathi and she gives
me the i
ll-kick-ur-ass-if-dont-come-with-me-to-the-
station look....of course she s right...i
make her wait for 30 mins just to tell her
that i am not leaving but studying in
college...i finally tell her to go alone
and i come back with sinan to college to
study...we do 1 chapter and we leave for
home...
...........really stupid post i

know........but i warned you in the

beginning!!!!

awakening!!!!

mike was his name. a brilliant kid at school. one who never came second in his class.. one who was never out-skilled at football, basketball or swimming. one who excelled at all extra-curricular and co-curricular activities throughout his school life... he was perfect..and because of his nature..he wasnt envied at all...everyone used to be happy at his success..perfectionist!!!

as he passed out of school and entered colllege, something happened. mike wasnt the same. he was easily distracted and easy going..not what you would expect from a topper..his acads started to shake..but he recovered just in time....in syjc..he snapped back..not to his best ..but near about same enthusiasm was back...he scored well in his hsc and cet and managed to get into the second best engineering college in mumbai(iit not included in that count!!!!)
..he was satisfied..his parents too...but that was just the beginning.....

semester 1:..he couldnt adjust at all...to the new surroundings..especially the style of studying..so different..so difficult..and time was so less...all thanks to the great mumbai university..who has been screwing careers since god know how many years..sem1 exam and mike was trembling with fear...he did really badly and was worried ....but he cleared all subs...got a bad percentage but cleared..satisfaction again...but he swore to score in the second sem...unfortunately that too didnt happen bacause he got carried away ...3rd sem was a do or die situation for him...little did he realise that it was a do AND die situation...he studied really hard but still managed to suck at the exam.....
..mike was confused..afraid..disgusted..down..low..depressed..everyone had scored...except him..continuously he blamed himself for everything...thinking that its all over..his health started to deteriorate..badly..he thought of himself as someone who just couldnt do anything no matter how hard he tried...his health deteriorated furthur...he took no notice...."y me..y couldnt i .."..he kept ranting this all the time...his friends tried everything to get him out of it...but to no avail..his health was a serious issue now,,,because of lack of sleep and improper diet...he was continuosly puking blood....he went for a checkup and the doc told him that he may be sufferring from cancer...and to carry out some carcinogenic tests....mike heard that but didnt move a muscle...he seriously didnt feel anything..after 2 weeks of tests and regular visits to the doc..the test results were negative..his friends and family were really happy for him...but he still didnt feel anything...because something in him had changed when his doc had told him that he may have cancer..he wasnt scared..he just realised that if he did suffer from it and was going to die a early death..then what would he look back upon his life as? the useless struggle he s been through? the continous cribbing that life is unfair? the eternally depressing thoughts which used to haunt his mind??? the hell-ranting suicidal tendencies??? what was he going to look back upon???...
...that day itself, mike had changed...even before the test results came...he was this happy jolly person...he stil has a long way to go...he stil has to work hard..he s stil in a bad position as far as acads are concerned..but hes not depressed..and i hope he succeeds this time...cause if he does then he ll carry this attitude throughout his life"".....

life is a journey...you cant stop in between saying that i didnt get what i want...look around you...not everyone has got what they want...it may even be possible that they have got and you havent.but that s their destiny not yours..you didnt get it because it wasnt meant for you...it wasnt YOURS. destiny is fixed for everyone. it lays down a path for us to follow. we follow it not knowing what the outcome may be..thats the fun of it...that is life..if everyone knew what they were going to be in the future, then whats the point? we are al groping in the dark trying to find our destinies..in the process if one can remain happy..he lives a good life..if he doesnt then stil he gets wat hes destined to but leads a very depressing life..
so the next time you are low..think of it as a sin...nothing is as imporatant as your soul..you cant trouble it...its priceless...happiness is not an achievement...it never was..it has become an achievement...when you were small did u need a reason to be happy? u were always happy n someone had to make you sad to change your state of mind....now someoene has to make you happy..what a bad transformation..there is still time...change yourself...it ll take some time but its not difficult...work hard but at the end dont crib if you dont get something,,accept it....remember this--
" PEOPLE SAY WHATEVER HAPPENS IS FOR THE GOOD..BULLSHIT..REFRAME IT...
WHATEVER HAPPENS ..IT IS MINE!...AND I AM PROUD OF IT NO MATTER WHAT..."

people will talk as they always do...like i said their job is to talk...about others...dont listen to them..do what you think is right..and care a fuck...always...

look up to yourself...its the most important thing..live for the moment..rape the past fuck the future...one of them you cant change and the other you dont know...at this moment i am writing all this bullshit and thats all i am thinking about...
and b positive!
amen!!!!!

arsenal...........again!

out of the f.a. cup.........out of the champions league..........and 5 draws and a loss in the premier league...leaves arsenal with nothing left to fight for........its sad to see a tired , injured , low-on-bench strength arsenal sqad line up against filthy rich clubs with so many signings....still we play the best football ...call me a hopeless gunner.....but i still believe in flair.........and arsenal plays that best..........whatever u say.....no one can steal that from the young gunners...so many things happened this season.cant forget the tackle on eduardo...god bless you man......hope to see you running again..."the beautiful game isnt so beautiful after all",.. eh pratap? but i can still hear manutd supporters shouting last season that arsenal is going to land up in bottom leg of the table....screw u guys...anyways..best of luck gunners.!

(am sorry mr. wenger but i still fail to understand y u play senderos...it really makes all arsenal supporters go red faced..!!! )

random bullshit

...lets cut the "i havent-updated-ma-blog-for-a-long-time-excuses"...i ve plenty of things to talk about but just cant frame any of it in words...
lets see.....lets start with what s been happeneing lately.....college has become really dull....all i can see is people getting committed and in love and all that bullshit...not that i have any problem with that(!!!)...but o well anyways...thats all that sp is upto right now.......love is in the air in sp....bullshit...seriously....whatever.......midterms came nd went.......dont ask........vivas and submissions coming up fast....dont ask about that either....chai club goin on fine....pcomm project gone to the dogs...but even the dogs are finding it useless(sorry for the sick humour...am plain mindfucked)...prataps really busy with his insignia work(sorry dude ...really couldnt write for the mag)..dimple too ....sinan had his head shaved again...i dont know.......ask him why...saw brett getting broke for the first time...lol...saw rahul with money to spend...tht too for the first time...rohit and amey are obssessed with dota-warcraft...dont know what pleasure they derive...medhas tensed about her studies...(hahahah)...the terrible trio or what was tht ? achanak bhayanaks? ya they re fine.....still dont know y u did that noopur...u luk lik a chini now!...ashwathi is fine as always...sachin i guess has found his love after all......love screwing u man..........taha!!!ya dude will return ur belt shortly...as soon as i find it!!!!...hina has finally completed her diploma in sinan-education this week.,..she can now understand everythin almost as well as medha can ..lol...naveli following suit ................
nothing else to talk about for the time being.......will update soon.......cheeeeeeeeers!