awakening!!!!

mike was his name. a brilliant kid at school. one who never came second in his class.. one who was never out-skilled at football, basketball or swimming. one who excelled at all extra-curricular and co-curricular activities throughout his school life... he was perfect..and because of his nature..he wasnt envied at all...everyone used to be happy at his success..perfectionist!!!

as he passed out of school and entered colllege, something happened. mike wasnt the same. he was easily distracted and easy going..not what you would expect from a topper..his acads started to shake..but he recovered just in time....in syjc..he snapped back..not to his best ..but near about same enthusiasm was back...he scored well in his hsc and cet and managed to get into the second best engineering college in mumbai(iit not included in that count!!!!)
..he was satisfied..his parents too...but that was just the beginning.....

semester 1:..he couldnt adjust at all...to the new surroundings..especially the style of studying..so different..so difficult..and time was so less...all thanks to the great mumbai university..who has been screwing careers since god know how many years..sem1 exam and mike was trembling with fear...he did really badly and was worried ....but he cleared all subs...got a bad percentage but cleared..satisfaction again...but he swore to score in the second sem...unfortunately that too didnt happen bacause he got carried away ...3rd sem was a do or die situation for him...little did he realise that it was a do AND die situation...he studied really hard but still managed to suck at the exam.....
..mike was confused..afraid..disgusted..down..low..depressed..everyone had scored...except him..continuously he blamed himself for everything...thinking that its all over..his health started to deteriorate..badly..he thought of himself as someone who just couldnt do anything no matter how hard he tried...his health deteriorated furthur...he took no notice...."y me..y couldnt i .."..he kept ranting this all the time...his friends tried everything to get him out of it...but to no avail..his health was a serious issue now,,,because of lack of sleep and improper diet...he was continuosly puking blood....he went for a checkup and the doc told him that he may be sufferring from cancer...and to carry out some carcinogenic tests....mike heard that but didnt move a muscle...he seriously didnt feel anything..after 2 weeks of tests and regular visits to the doc..the test results were negative..his friends and family were really happy for him...but he still didnt feel anything...because something in him had changed when his doc had told him that he may have cancer..he wasnt scared..he just realised that if he did suffer from it and was going to die a early death..then what would he look back upon his life as? the useless struggle he s been through? the continous cribbing that life is unfair? the eternally depressing thoughts which used to haunt his mind??? the hell-ranting suicidal tendencies??? what was he going to look back upon???...
...that day itself, mike had changed...even before the test results came...he was this happy jolly person...he stil has a long way to go...he stil has to work hard..he s stil in a bad position as far as acads are concerned..but hes not depressed..and i hope he succeeds this time...cause if he does then he ll carry this attitude throughout his life"".....

life is a journey...you cant stop in between saying that i didnt get what i want...look around you...not everyone has got what they want...it may even be possible that they have got and you havent.but that s their destiny not yours..you didnt get it because it wasnt meant for you...it wasnt YOURS. destiny is fixed for everyone. it lays down a path for us to follow. we follow it not knowing what the outcome may be..thats the fun of it...that is life..if everyone knew what they were going to be in the future, then whats the point? we are al groping in the dark trying to find our destinies..in the process if one can remain happy..he lives a good life..if he doesnt then stil he gets wat hes destined to but leads a very depressing life..
so the next time you are low..think of it as a sin...nothing is as imporatant as your soul..you cant trouble it...its priceless...happiness is not an achievement...it never was..it has become an achievement...when you were small did u need a reason to be happy? u were always happy n someone had to make you sad to change your state of mind....now someoene has to make you happy..what a bad transformation..there is still time...change yourself...it ll take some time but its not difficult...work hard but at the end dont crib if you dont get something,,accept it....remember this--
" PEOPLE SAY WHATEVER HAPPENS IS FOR THE GOOD..BULLSHIT..REFRAME IT...
WHATEVER HAPPENS ..IT IS MINE!...AND I AM PROUD OF IT NO MATTER WHAT..."

people will talk as they always do...like i said their job is to talk...about others...dont listen to them..do what you think is right..and care a fuck...always...

look up to yourself...its the most important thing..live for the moment..rape the past fuck the future...one of them you cant change and the other you dont know...at this moment i am writing all this bullshit and thats all i am thinking about...
and b positive!
amen!!!!!